There was a day when this post would be directed at just the men, but that day is long gone. Unfortunately, this is for all people regardless of gender or age.

Let me start by saying that I firmly believe that God created you to make an impact. To live a life that your kids will be proud to tell their friends about.

But, there is a silent killer that used to hide on the top shelves at the gas station or that strange small store outside of town.

Now that very same dream/confidence/marriage killer lives on every screen in our lives.

The stats are clear.

The question isn't IF you are dealing with pornography. It's HOW are you dealing with it?

The same screen you're reading this post on can be used to play a game with your child, check email, study scripture or watch porn. Desktop, laptop, or smartphone doesn't matter.

If you are watching pornography with any sort of consistency, I want you to know a few things.

1) You are not alone.

  • The voices in your head tell you you're gross and alone. They'll tell you that the ones that love you would be disgusted by you so keep it buried.

  • The truth is, there are people in your life that want to walk this journey with you.

2) It affects everything.

  • You may think that it's just a few innocent moments that don't hurt anyone. The reality is that you know full well the damage it is doing. Like a cancer eating you from the inside out, it feeds on your passion, your confidence, and your dreams until you are a shell of who you used to be.

  • Sexual sin is a crazy thing. It has the ability to fundamentally change how you see everything. It changes how you see God. How you see your spouse. How you see yourself. How you see your future.

  • I haven't seen anything even close to the power of sexual sin to rip the heart, passion and confidence out of someone.

3) There is hope.

  • Listen to me very closely. You DO NOT have to live a life tied to this addiction. I know you feel ashamed. I know you feel dirty. I know you feel like this is your new normal. THAT IS NOT TRUE.

  • Because of the grace of God, you are as clean as Christ. He took the penalty so don't punish yourself any longer.

  • You are free. You need to begin by seeing yourself that way. You are not chained to this. It is something you did, but it is NOT WHO YOU ARE.

Here are a few quick tips to get you headed in the right direction:

  1. Find a same gender friend and confess fully to him/her. Ask them to pray for you. Contact them each and every time you are tempted.

  2. Remove temptation. That may mean putting the computer in a public space, showering with the door unlocked, or ending your data plan. You know what you need to do. Pray for courage to do it.

  3. Create a new pattern. This may sound silly, but I've seen it work for so many people. When you are tempted to look at porn, allow it to be a trigger for a healthy behavior. Go for a run. Do 50 burpees. Read your bible. Pray for strength. Something. Little by little, that trigger will become dull and eventually go away altogether.

  4. Lastly, check out xxx church. They have tons of great resources. From computer software to blogs to support groups.

As you root out this cancer from your heart, you'll see health come back to your soul. You'll see passion restored. Confidence rise. There will be peace at your core. Ultimately, you'll see yourself becoming the man/woman you were intended to be.

I believe in you! If I can be of any help, you can always shoot me an email. I'd love to be a support!


I've attached an infographic below that is simply breathtaking but will give even more color to the topic at hand.


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